218

THE GREEN BAG

THE LIGHTER SIDE Highly Suspicious. — " It is a rule to which good, lawyers usually adhere," says a Phila delphia attorney, " never to tell more than one knows. There was an instance in Eng land, not many years ago, wherein a lawyer carried the rule to the extreme. "One of the agents in a Midland Revision Court objected to a person whose name was on the register, on the ground that he was dead. The revision attorney declined to accept the assurance, however, and demanded conclusive testimony on the point. "The agent on the other side arose and gave corroborative evidence as to the decease of the man in question. "' But, sir, how do you know the man's dead?' demanded the barrister. "' Well,' was the reply, ' I don't know. It's very difficult to prove.' "' As I suspected,' returned the barrister. ' You don't know whether he's dead or not.' "Whereupon the witness coolly continued: ' I was saying, sir, that I don't know whether he is dead or not; but I do know this: they buried him about a month ago on suspicion." — Harper's Weekly. A Lawyer's Luck. —• A North Carolina lawyer says that when Judge Buxton of that State, made his first appearance at the bar as a young lawyer, he was given charge by the State's solicitor, of the prosecution of a man charged with some misdemeanor. It soon appeared that there was no evi dence against the man, but Buxton did his best, and was astonised when the ' jury brought in a verdict of " guilty." After the trial one of the jurors tapped the young attorney on the shoulder. " Buxton," said he, " we didn't think the feller was guilty, but at the same time didn't like to discourage a young lawyer by acquitting him." — Lippincott's.

"I know, your honor," said he, warm ly, " that it is proper evidence. Here I have been practicing at the bar for 40 years, and now I want to know if I am a fool?" "That," quietly replied the court, " is a question of fact, and not of law, so I won't pass any opinion upon it, but will let the jury decide," — Stray Stories. Lawsuits About Trifles. — Some years ago, when a Scottish farmer brought an action against the customs authorities for a wrong ful levy of id, he recovered his id at a cost to himself and the defendants of £150 each. An attempt to recover Jd from a Miss Annie Rayson cost a London tramways company £150 damages for malicious pros ecution, in addition to heavy costs in all three sets of proceedings. But perhaps the most instructive case of all is one that was fought to the bitter end in the Italian courts. A lawyer sued the octroi authorities for the recovery of a centime which he had been compelled to pay on a box of bon bons. This case was carried from court to court, with the ultimate result that the de fendants had to refund the centime and to pay 3000 lire in addition for the expenses of the litigation.

Not for the Court to Decide. The judge decided that certain evidence was inadmis sible. The attorney took strong exception to the ruling and insisted that it was admis sible.

Within His Rights. — The Judge — " Was your chauffeur guilty in this accident?" The Prisoner —•" No, your honor, the victim was run over in entire compliance with the ordinance." — Meggcndorjer Blactter.

A Higher Court. — " Ever try an automo bile, Judge?" said a friend. "No," replied the Judge; " but I've tried a lot of people who have." — Jewish Ledger. False Economy. — Patsy. — Begorra, Oi couldn't pay my $3 foine and Oi had to go to jail for six days. Mike. — An" how much did yez spend to get drunk?" Patsy. — Oh, 'bout $3. Mike — Three dollars? Yes, -fool, 'if yez had not spent yez $3 for drink yez'd had yer $3 to pay yez foine wid. — Harper's Weekly.