But Frazer's most unnatural next of kin Were vexed to have the widow get the gun; Said 't was not " household property " within A solitary case since time had run.

Their counsel argued that they could n't find Its use about the house in law or grammar; It could not saw nor chop nor wash nor grind, Nor serve for poker, rolling-pin, nor hammer.

But they forgot its immemorial use, As fastened to the ceiling by two hooks, It served to dry the vigorous, pungent juice Of strings of apples hung there by the cooks.

But Bangs, the lawyer on the other side, — And most appropriately named was he, — This foolish argument did much deride, And doubtless in the end did dance with glee;

For this wise court let Mrs. Frazer go, Loaded for bear or prison-bird or grouse, Because the next-of-kin had failed to show She might not need it " to defend the house."

Most just decision; for as all men know, A house in wilds of Caledonia village Is much exposed to dangers high and low, Of riot, burglary, and theft and pillage,

From tramp and beggar and from harvest-hand, And dog of wits bereft, which to and fro Prey unrestrained on that unhappy land, And full of apple-pie and mutton go.

No matter if the widow couldn't shoot, Nor knew the muzzle from the deadly breach, It just as well her purposes did suit To have the empty gun within her reach.